Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: Joe Wicks goes, ‘That’s our warm-up completed.’ I’m already focked

My Leinster training top is a bit snugger than usual. I may have gone too hord on the chocolate

The Easter egg hunt was pure focking terrifying. The three of them went through the gorden like shorks scenting chump.

The Easter egg hunt was pure focking terrifying. The three of them went through the gorden like shorks scenting chump.

Sorcha has decided that, for as long as this lockdown lasts, we should all get dressed every morning as if it’s just a regular day. She’s not saying it explicitly, but I suspect this has something to do with the Zoom call with her family on Easter Monday, when I stood up – totally forgetting that I was wearing boxer shorts – and apparently “popped out”.

I know Sorcha’s old dear was upset about it, because I could hear Sorcha on the phone to her afterwards, going, “Breathe, Mom! Breathe!”

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