‘I’ve been booking supermorket delivery slots weeks in advance. Then selling them for €70 each’
Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: Welcome to the horsh realities of the free morket, Honor goes
'Why do you have to shout? I told you before, if you want me for something, just text me the details and I’ll decide if it’s important enough for me to come downstairs.'
So – yeah, no – I walk into the dining room to be confronted by a sight I never thought I’d see. My five-year-old triplets are playing cords with my old man, each with a lorge brandy in front of him and a cigor long enough to inseminate a whale wedged between their tiny fingers.
I’m like, “What the fock is going on here?”