I can hear the old dear’s hysterical voice going, ‘Better men than you have eaten my one-pot stews!’
Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: ‘As Sorcha said, I shouldn’t have been throwing the old Gilbert around at her Ulysses fancy dress porty’

Sorcha’s in the shower when her phone all of a sudden rings.
“Ross,” she goes, “will you get that?” and I roll my eyes because I’m trying to watch Racing against Exeter, but it’s the third time in, like, five minutes that I’ve found myself listening to Katy Perry’s Firework, which has been her ringtone ever since she applied for promotion as Head of Something, Something, Something (EMEA region) in LinkedIn.