My narcissistic mother is manipulating my daughters and I’m scared to death

Tell me about it: I have suffered years of whiplash mood swings and treading on egg shells to feed her insatiable need

‘Growing up in a home where the mother-love is conditional, withdrawn on a whim or compromised, can have life-long consequences for a child.’ Photograph: iStock

‘Growing up in a home where the mother-love is conditional, withdrawn on a whim or compromised, can have life-long consequences for a child.’ Photograph: iStock

Question: I have always just thought of my mother as demanding and difficult, but, finally, after 41 years of existence, I have come to realise that she is, in fact, narcissistic.

I feel awful just thinking about it, but it’s the truth, I have suffered years of whiplash mood swings and treading on egg shells to feed her insatiable need, for whatever it is she wants from me. I had just about learnt to ignore her ‘dramas’, but now she has set her sights on my girls who are 17, I am literally scared to death. I don’t know what to do – she has my sisters and brother in her pocket and they will do anything to appease her.

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