It started in 1956 with just seven countries participating, and for more than 40 years it has continued to fascinate and frustrate in equal measures, throwing up some of pop's most embarrassing moments and parading them in front of 100 million or so viewers. Every spring the Eurovision Song Contest draws sneers from cynical music lovers and brings up goosebumps in anybody who revels in kitschy showbiz spectacle - but most of all, it boosts the ratings in every European television network which broadcasts it. Up to 25 countries enter songs which bear no relation to modern pop tastes, sung by gaudily-dressed artists who look like they've arrived from another planet. We'll all pretend to hate it, but we'll invariably sneak a peek at it in the pub, or tell our friends, "Oh, I don't watch it - I just switch it on for the voting."
Terry Wogan explains its fascination in his foreword to The Complete Eurovision Song Contest Companion by Paul Gambaccini, Tim Rice, Jonathan Rice and Tony Brown: "I love it for its magnificent foolishness, its grand illusion that it brings together the diverse peoples and cultures of Europe on one great wing of song, when all it makes manifest is how far apart everybody is".
Eurovision has launched international stars such as Celine Dion, Julio Iglesias and ABBA, but it has also shot many a young hopeful back into obscurity. Famous people who competed - but didn't win - include Cliff Richard, Nana Mouskouri and Olivia Newton-John, and famous songs which didn't win but went on to become big international hits include Volare, Love Is Blue and Ooh, Aah . . . Just A Little Bit. The contest has spawned many a good-natured satire and back-handed tribute, like the famous episode of Father Ted featuring My Lovely Horse, or the recent CD release featuring Sinead O'Connor and Terry Hall dueting on All Kinds Of Everything and Shane MacGowan singing What's Another Year.
So here, in order of appearance, is your cut-out-and-weep guide to the 1998 Eurovision Song Contest, which comes live from Birmingham at 8 p.m. tomorrow night, presented by Ulrika Jonsson and Terry Wogan.
Croatia
Song: May The Sun Never Rise.
Lyric sample: "May I fade away/ May I cease to be/May I never wake without you".
Singer: Danijela, one of Croatia's biggest female singers, formerly in top band Magazin. Her sister Izabela is also big in Croatia.
Past glories: Croatia made its Eurovision debut in 1993, reaching a peak of 4th place in 1996.
GreeceSong: Secret Illusion.
Lyric sample: "With your shining words of silver/ And the breathing of your haze/ In the night"
Singer: Dionyssia Karoki, singer in Greek group Thalassa.
Past glories: 5th place in 1977 and 1992. Pulled out of contest in 1975 because of Turkey's inclusion, then re-entered in 1976 with a song in protest at the Turkish invasion of Cyprus.
France
Song: Where To Go.
Lyric sample: "You have nowhere to go/When you are stuck".
Singer: Marie-Line, singer of French-Caribbean extract who was backing singer in her brother's group, Soul Afro Punk.
Past glories: Five-times winner, gained its biggest success in 1976 with Un, Deux, Trois, sung by Catherine Ferry. Its 1961 entry, Printemps, featured an early example of Eurobabble, with its chorus of "binge bong, binge bong."
Spain
Song: What Will I Do Without You?
Lyric sample: "How can I give you my love/So many kisses I haven't given to you".
Singer: Mikel Herzog, a popular young balladeer who produces and directs top Hispano-poppers Zapato Veloz.
Past glories: Won two years running, in 1968 and 1969.
Switzerland
Song: Just Leave Him Be.
Lyric sample: "His love is like an earthquake/Break your soul and bring you heartache".
Singer: Gunvor, a 23-year-old Celine Dion copyist, and a Swiss tap-dancing champion.
Past glories: Won the first-ever Eurovision in 1956, then topped that in 1988 by getting a Canadian, Celine Dion, to sing 'em a winner.
Slovakia
Song: A Prayer.
Lyric sample: "Hoping in miracles/Inside of us/Only us".
Singer: Katarina Hasprova, daughter of a famous actress/ singer and a well-known director. She has appeared in Hair and West Side Story, following a great tradition of Eurovision singers starring in stage musicals.
Past glories: Reached a dizzy 18th place in 1996, but give them time - this is only their fourth time to enter.
Poland
Song: When Love Turns To Hate.
Lyric sample: "I wake up: a new day is dawning".
Singer: Sixteen, a chart-busting group who have a big fan base in their native country. Their current hit single is the rather naughtysounding Wake Up Venus In Me.
Past glories: First entered Eurovision in 1994, reaching a remarkable second place.
Israel
Song: Diva.
Lyric sample: "Viva to the Diva".
Singer: Dana International, the most controversial entry this year, due to the fact that she is a transsexual. She is hugely successful in her native Israel, and her albums also sell millions in Egypt and Jordan.
Past glories: Izhar Cohen, Israel's answer to Freddie Mercury, swept the scoreboard in 1978 with the A- Ba-Ni-Bi, which was actually based on children's talk.
Germany
Song: Guildo Loves You.
Lyric sample: "So even if you're sad/He'll come over and sing you a song".
Singer: Guildo Horn, a close challenger to Dana International as this year's most outrageous entry. Much to the annoyance of Germany's stuffed shirts, this flamboyant pop star was voted for by the public, and teeth will be gritted all round when he struts onstage with his band, Orthopaedic Stockings.
Past glories: Winners in 1982 with Ein Bissen Frieden, sung by a 17-year-old schoolgirl named Nicole, and written by Ralph Siegel, making his fourth attempt at penning a winner. It subsequently became a UK Top Ten hit under the title, A Little Peace.
Malta
Song: The One That I Love.
Lyric sample: "I'll never let you go/This must be love".
Singer: Chiara, Maltese folk singer who has done the Julie Andrews thing in a stage version of The Sound Of Music.
Past glories: 3rd place in 1992.
Hungary
Song: Tomorrow Won't Be Blue
Lyric sample: "She's so beautiful, we must have fallen asleep and be dreaming/And if the heavenly pilgrim is not so hard after all".
Singer: Charlie, a major star in Hungary who pulled 17,000 fans to his 1996 concert in Budapest.
Past glories: 4th in 1994, pulling ahead of Ireland's Rock 'N' Roll Kids, but soon falling behind Paul Harrington and Charlie McGettigan's unstoppable winner.
Slovenia
Song: Will The Gods Set Me Free.
Lyric sample: "Will they hear my plea/Will they save me/I can't live without her love"
Singer: Vili Resnik, rock singer from Ljubljana who fronted Pop Design, Slovenia's answer to The Verve.
Past Glories: A lucky 7th place in 1995.
Ireland
Song: It's Always Over Now.
Lyric sample: "To think that love would last/Was mistaken on my part".
Singer: Dawn, 21-year-old former hairdresser from Dundalk who started her singing career as a choirgirl.
Past glories: The most wins with seven, including two victories by Johnny Logan, who also penned Linda Martin's winning entry. When Ireland hosted Eurovision for the first time in 1971, they had an Irish dance troupe in the interval, but the Shannon Castle Entertainers fell somewhat short of the success which Riverdance achieved 23 years later.
Portugal
Song: If I Could Only Hold You.
Lyric sample: "Wandering wandering under a clear blue sky/ Motherland, country, home so far away it makes me cry".
Singer: Alma Lusa, a group formed specifically for this year's contest. This must be the first example of a prefabricated Eurovision entry.
Past glories: The lyricist of Portugal's 1973 entry was jailed because of the song's allegedly political overtones.
Romania
Song: I Do Believe.
Lyric sample: "If I could touch your world/I'll call you back, so help me, God!"
Singer: Malina Olinescu, 24-yearold singer from Bucharest.
Past glories: Has only entered once before, reaching 21st place in 1994.
United Kingdom
Song: Where Are You?
Lyric sample: "I would drive through the rain/Walk a desert plain".
Singer: Imaani, Nottingham-born singer who has worked with Lulu, The Pretenders, James Brown and Michael Bolton. Not to be confused with the batty American singer Imani Coppola.
Past glories: The Brits have won it five times, most recently last year with Love Shine A Light, by Katrina & The Waves.
Cyprus
Song: Genesis.
Lyric sample: "On the prehistoric earth/The primordial cry/The celebration of youth and freedom".
Singer: Michael Hajiyanni, 20year-old from Nicosia who is still finishing his military service.
Past glories: Cyprus never votes for either Turkey or the United Kingdom, indicating disfavour towards occupying forces and squaddies.
Netherlands
Song: Heaven And Earth
Lyric sample: "Heaven and earth are moving/When you are standing in front of me".
Singer: Edsilia Rombley, popular choice with Dutch voters after her rendition of Tina Turner's Simply The Best. We'll see.
Past glories: Four-time winner, most famously in 1975 with the dreadful Ding Dinge Dong, sung by ABBA imitators, Teach-In.
Sweden
Song: Love Is.
Lyric sample: "An angel flew by/ On her way to Heaven, so free".
Singer: Jill Johnson, performing a saccharine tribute to Diana, Princess Of Wales.
Past glories: ABBA, the best thing ever to come out of Eurovision, but also Diggi-Loo Diggy-Ley, the most execrable winner in the contest's history.
Belgium
Song: Say Yes.
Lyric sample: "And then/The world needs reconstruction/Say yes/Come for life, come for an hour".
Singer: Melanie Cohl, 16-year-old who entered her first song contest at the age of eight, so she's an old hand by now.
Past glories: Scored the first-ever nul points in 1962, then finally won in 1986 after a 30-year wait.
Finland
Song: Widths.
Lyric sample: "Open landscapes, open up your views/Wide open".
Singer: Edea, a lively musical group which uses runic symbols, amulets and Viking paraphernalia to get across its pseudo-mythological message.
Past glories: Has been responsible for some of Eurovision's more bizarre entries, including the country-flavoured Old Man Fiddle, and the cod-Jamaican Reggae OK.
Norway
Song: Summer For Ever.
Lyric sample: "Reaching out for me - it feels so good/Oh, oh, oh, oh, summer for ever, you said".
Singer: Lars A. Fredriksen, soloist with the Oslo Gospel Choir.
Past glories: Came away with nul points a record-breaking four times, but won the contest twice, the second time with Nocturne, an almost-entirely instrumental tune which featured Irishwoman Fionnuala Sherry on violin.
Estonia
Song: Children Of Sea.
Lyric sample: "And baby there's a whole new world out there/ Together there'll be love and dreams to share".
Singer: Koit Toome, another former choir singer who recently sang in chart-topping Estonian pop group Code One.
Past glories: Had a late surge in the 1996 voting, but alas, not enough to catch up with Ireland's Eimear Quinn.
Turkey
Song: You Cannot Forget
Lyric sample: "Didn't our hearts stop beating when we were apart?/ You cannot forget even if years pass by".
Singer: Tuzmen, Ankara-born singer who has also represented Turkey as a swimmer.
Past glories: Joint last in 1983 with a frankly weird tune called Opera, sung by a group dressed as characters in (guess what?) an opera. Broke its near-perfect run of poor results by coming third last year.
Fyrom (Former Yugoslavian Republic of Macedonia)
Song: Somebody Stop The Dawn.
Lyric sample: "Another drink, so I may think/You'll be here to stay".
Singer: Vlado Janevski, the country's most succesful pop star, who has even entered the Cavan Song Contest.
Past glories: Becoming an independent Balkan state, I suppose.
