Q&A: GERT THOMAS, story producer and script editor for TG4's 'Ros na Rún', which returns for its 15th season later this month, talks to EOIN BUTLER
How does a Welshman find himself working on an Irish-language soap opera?I'd been writing for British soaps like Casualty, Eastenders and Holby City for years. But my wife and I had the idea of going to live abroad with the kids for a while as an adventure. I'd rather set my sights on Australia, to be quite honest. But when this job came up over a year ago, we thought why not? Spiddal isn't quite Bondi Beach. But when the sun comes out, there's nowhere on earth you'd rather be.
How have your family adjusted to life in Connemara?I have three children aged eight, nine and 10 and they're in a Gaelscoil here so it was a challenge. But the oldest and youngest are fluent in Irish now – which is amazing when you consider they've only been here for one school year. My son is playing Gaelic football and hurling for Spiddal too. Our middle daughter is resisting it a little. But I've noticed lately that if I speak to her in Welsh, she'll reply to me in Irish. So we're getting there.
Any negatives?The architecture, oddly enough. We had romantic notions of finding a lovely old cottage to live in. But there tends to be far more newer buildings here. Empty buildings at that.
An bhfuil aon Gaeilge agat?[Pause.] Cúpla focal.
So you're the script editor for an Irish-language soap opera and you don't speak Irish. How does that work?My main duty is to develop the story arcs for each season. So I'm involved in the storylines, I work with the writers and script editors and I also have a hand in casting. It's an all-round job. As far as not having fluent Irish, I'm taking lessons at the moment, but it does complicate things at times. The scripts are written in Irish but then translated into English. But I'm lucky that I've got a very good support team working with me.
What are the secrets to writing a successful soap?A good sense of drama and a love for the genre. You've got to love the genre. Personally, I love playing god and manipulating people's lives every day. They're not real people, of course, but they become real to us and hopefully to the audience, too.
In the sitcom 'Friends', Matt LeBlanc's character Joey is a soap actor who gets written out of the show he stars in when he annoys the writers . . .Yes, I remember that. They decided to have him fall down an elevator shaft, didn't they?
Have you ever been tempted to do anything petty or vindictive like that?Oh, it's very tempting. And without naming any names, it does happen. When someone oversteps the mark, or they do something that irritates you, or their character isn't working out that well, you do tend to think, well, would it be that much of a shame if we lost them? But you don't wield that power to be vindictive. You try to do what's best for the show.
Who do you think is the greatest soap character ever?That's a tough question, but I'd have to go for Dot Cotton. I grew up watching Eastenders, so it was an amazing honour to be given the chance to write scenes for June Brown [who plays Dot] and the late Wendy Richards [who played Pauline Fowler] in the launderette.
Is it an urban legend or did the producers of 'Eastenders' once declare a moratorium on having Phil Mitchell ask people if he could have a quick word?[Laughs.] No, that's a new one on me.
Are there any classic mistakes that inexperienced writers tend to make?I'm not sure, but asking people if you can have a quick word would definitely be one. If I saw that in a script I'd definitely try to have it changed. The rule tends to be "show, don't tell". But the funniest cock up I ever came across was I was working on a radio drama back in Wales. We had a new writer in and she'd written a very nice episode. But I'll never forget, the final scene ended with the words: "Close-up of swinging lightbulb."
Finally, are there any outlandish storylines you would never use?Well, as far as possible you set your drama in the real world. So you're not going to have an alien invasion – although I believe one American soap opera did do that once. There are some fantastic storylines coming up on Ros na Rún this season. I'm not talking about cars exploding and buildings falling down. I'm talking about deep-hearted emotional stories about the decisions people make as parents, as adults, as human beings. I'm very proud of the job the writers have done. People will have to tune in and see.
Ros na Rúnreturns to TG4 on September 21st