The must-have toys that scramble onto the last lap of the Grand Prix Christmas Toy Circuit are rarely fair of face. Think Cabbage Patch dolls, Ninja Turtles, Power Rangers, and Teletubbies. Create something spectacularly ugly, and release only a few of them into the shops, and you're bound to have a massive hit on your hands.
This year's big toys for Christmas are the much-hyped Furby and our very own Dustin the Talking Turkey. (No offence, Dustin, what you lack in looks, you make up for in personality - or should that be birdability?) So, what's a Furby? It ain't a new acronym for fussy urbanites like Nimbys (Not In My Back Yard). It's a five-inch high furry interactive . . . er, thing. What does it look like?
Well, a Furby is fluffy, and comes in a range of different colours; black and white, brown and white, grey and white. It has big bat-like ears and stary eyes; a sort of a preGremlin Gremlin before they transmogrified into evil critters and ended up exploding in microwaves. Or an owl crossed with a rodent. Or a furry version of the mysterious creature carved in stone at Boa Island in Fermanagh. And it has been bombing out of toy shops in the US and Britain for the last month as soon as ever a batch arrived in.
Once equipped with the vital organs of batteries, there is no stopping the Furby, billed as an interactive toy. It talks a type of gibberish named Furbish, as well as some English words, with 800 phrases in total. The longer you have it, the more English it will speak to you. Words like "boring", "party" and "hide and seek".
When excited, delighted, or scared (scared must be when the batteries are running down) it exercises its range of physical expressions. That means, it sneezes, giggles, responds to tickling, wags its ears, and has difficulty keeping its eyes in its sockets, so frequently do they pop in and out.
"No two Furbies will act the same way," explains Colm Carroll of Super Toys in his O'Connell Street, Dublin, shop. "And the more time you spend playing with them, the more they learn." He holds up the only unsold Furby in Dublin to the phone so that this reporter can listen to Furbish. Periodic sneezing comes down the phone. Our climate obviously doesn't agree with the little critter.
Both Colm Carroll and Declan Brady, the manager of Bamba Toymaster in Dublin's Mary Street agree that the Furby is going to be the elusive toy giving parents nightmares this year. Neither shop currently has any of the £32.99 Furbies in stock, although both are expecting smallish consignments to arrive soon. "We're asked to order toys at least nine months in advance of Christmas," explains Brady, "and it's impossible to predict at that stage what the big toys are going to be later in the year."
The other winner this year is going to be Dustin the Talking Turkey, which is due into selected shops "sometime" next week, selling at £29.99. He's billed as a 14-inch soft toy and comes dressed in a bomber jacket, jeans and Docs. "We think he'll appeal to a wide range of people, not just children," Carroll predicts. "He'd be a great fun present for boyfriends and girlfriends."
We've had a few incarnations of Dustin so far in his illustrious nine-year career: Tee Vee bird-anality; would-be Tee Dee; and Hiace Van Dustin. Also, Singing Dustin, with hit records. There are however, despite their recent success, no plans for a Singing ToyBoy Joe Dolan. Oh me, oh my, what a mistake.
"We've had a phenomenal number of calls about Talking Dustin," both Carroll and Brady say. "People are screaming for Dustin," Carroll reports gleefully. No wonder. It's not only the children of the house who want a builder to visit on a permanent basis. Think of it. You needn't wait in for your no-show builder to arrive any more: just put batteries in the turkey instead and leave him to get on with all those jobs when you're out and about. Or do you?
"He says 10 different things," Brady explains. "Like, `Go on, ya good thing!' " Worryingly, however, it would appear that a bird in the house does not necessarily mean you'll have one in the hand to do your bidding as well. Brady warns: "Dustin also says, `I'm a builder. I'll be round to you on Tuesday. But you don't know which Tuesday!' "
And if you can't get hold of a Furby for the young ones in your life, don't despair. Buy a Talking Dustin instead. If you close your eyes, you won't know the difference. They both specialise in belching.
