Oh those Star Wars fans! They’re such cards. If they’re not declaring themselves as Jedi Knights on census forms, they’re petitioning the White House to build a Death Star.

Thirty four thousand people have, indeed, urged the President to construct an intergalactic planet-destroying machine.

Paul Shawcross, a senior official at the White House Office of Management and Budget, commented: Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship? Good line, sir.