VENICE:While the charms of Venice are many, CONOR POPEand his young family had more fun in a seaside campsite nearby
I knew Venice was sinking but I’d hoped it wasn’t going to go under almost as soon as our ferry docked at St Mark’s Square. Deciding, on a whim, to leave the Union Lido campsite where we’d been perfectly content for a week, to visit the city in driving rain with a buggy, rucksack, huge golf umbrella and two small children was, in retrospect, a bit thick.
For all its breathtaking, romantic and crumbling beauty, Venice is a most pram-unfriendly city and it quickly becomes clear that every stepped bridge is going to be a bridge of sighs and each brush with a large, umbrella wielding American tourist – and the place is overrun with them – is going to be potentially murderous.
We walk, very slowly, through the maddening crowd in the direction of St Mark’s Square and get there just in time to see the heavy grey flagstones disappear under at least 10cm of rain water. It is acqua alta, or high tide, and the water is rising fast.
The city fathers are getting the elevated wooden walkways out which makes the place even more impossible to navigate with children so – wet, cold and miserable – we turn around and walk back to the dock in the rain. We pause to allow one of the many hilariously overpriced restaurants near St Mark’s to help itself to the contents of my wallet in exchange for three bowls of overcooked pasta and a bottle of water before taking the ferry back to the campsite.
I knew it was a mistake to leave the Union Lido, one of the best equipped campsites in Europe and a place which is very easy to like.
It is a resort that people (particularly those with young children) keep returning to – at least half a dozen families we met on the site were repeat visitors. That is hardly surprising as it has almost everything you could want within the confines of the 1sq km perimeter.
Except, perhaps authenticity – it could scarcely be further away from the rustic charm of a Tuscan hilltop village or the gritty, sweaty realism of a Neapolitan back street pension. The whole area surrounding the site, situated between the small resorts of Lido de Jesolo and Punto Sabbioni, has been built for tourists – mostly German tourists – over the last 30 years but if you can get over that stumbling block, it’s pretty brilliant.
I’m feeling fierce smug on arrival. The tour operator we booked with, and the Irish veteran of the site who tipped us off about its existence in the first place (a man who knows a thing or two about finance incidentally) had encouraged us to get a taxi from the airport. The 40km journey costs a fairly eye-watering €150 each way but a quick visit to TripAdvisor points to a better way. The public transport system is a much cheaper option and tickets for a bus which passes the site’s door can be bought at the airport for eight quid for two adults and two children. The transfer is seamless and hassle free and – when the return journey is factored in – costs €284 less than the cab rides.
After we check-in we walk past 1970s VW camper vans and their sleeker 21st century equivalents, huge tents with satellite dishes and fully fitted kitchens and pop-up jobs which would look more at home at the Electric Picnic.
There are wooden chalets and rows and rows of mobile homes. We’re staying in a three-bedroom Vivaldi mobile which comes with shower, air conditioning, barbecue and a patio. It is small but perfectly formed.
The site sits under a broad canopy of trees on a very child-friendly blue-flag beach. It has two huge pool complexes, three playgrounds, a saltwater health spa, a dozen restaurants (offering top notch pizzas and pasta dishes at knock down prices), several snack bars and ice cream parlours, two supermarkets, a pharmacy and several clothes and shoe shops – because what else do you need when camping but more shoes?
There is also an on-site doctor who doesn’t charge for his services, wi-fi across the camp (€8 for two hours) and a range of other facilities which means that you won’t have to leave the site.
If you do decide to venture further afield, the jewel that is Venice, once it’s not sinking, is a 40 minute bus and boat ride away. The smaller, but considerably more manageable Venetian islands of Burano, famous for its lace, and Murano, famous for its glassware – are similarly accessible.
The first few days on the site are spent adjusting to the pace of camp life and anxiously watching the skies. It is much cheaper to come here in May than in the height of summer, more than 70 per cent cheaper in fact, but we do gamble on the weather and initially it looks as if the gamble has cost us dear. Night and day the rain bounces off the metal roof of our mobile while thunder rumbles ominously overhead. It gives the site a damp, depressing atmosphere.
Trying to keep very young children entertained in such circumstances is not easy – once they've sang Rain Rain Go Awaya dozen times and realised that the song isn't working, they get distinctly fractious.
The three playgrounds are off limits so it is up to the kids club to save us. It doesn’t, at least not initially. On the first occasion we visit, it’s pretty grim. The weather has left the children who’ve crowded into the small room for “colouring school”, as my three-year-old calls it, in uniformly vile form and the “animation staff” struggle to be upbeat and chirpy when they’re clearly anything but.
Hours later at the kiddie disco, which runs for an hour each evening, everyone is in better form and the staff successfully get all the kids dancing to a collection of Europop tunes although the choice of a Venga Boys song with the lyric “Boom boom boom boom, I want you in my room, let’s spend the night together” is perhaps not ideal for toddlers.
When the sun shines it is wonderful to have the beach on your doorstep. There’s a kilometre of flat sand and water which is crystal clear.
A great deal of time is spent in the three playgrounds. One is on the beach, a second is in woodland and a third, made up of more than half a dozen bouncy castles, plastic slides, fairy houses, pink rocking horse and climbing frames is quickly dubbed the “best playground ever” by the Pope’s children. It only opens in the evening and costs a fiver a head but it is money well spent.
Adults aren’t forgotten and in addition to an adult only seawater health spa with a steam room, sauna and eight Jacuzzis, there is a woodland jogging track and fantastic 15-piece obstacle course where, early in the morning – and by early I mean 9am – my only company is the gambolling rabbits, dozens of the things. Some of the instructions on the equipment are baffling: two beams of wood, six inches off the ground, carry the message “flex the bust back and forth” which may mean “do some sit ups”, but who knows?
The Union Lido is not without its flaws. There are times when its regulations are tiresome. We have to surrender our passports upon arrival in exchange for some bar-coded passes. These are required to buy internet access and to gain access to the site if you leave it. On more than one occasion I was stopped by overzealous staff and asked for this flimsy pass despite the fact that I hadn’t actually left the camp. The camp is also closed to all traffic between noon and 2pm and if you arrive by car during these hours you’ll be forced to park outside the perimeter until the border guards come back from their siesta.
The staff at the information point where bus tickets and wi-fi access are sold are well meaning but infuriatingly slow and terminally officious. Another downside is that there are no towns on the doorstep. But the positives far outweigh the negatives. It is a cheap, hassle-free place to holiday with a young family and I plan to go back next year and spend my warm summer evenings hanging out in the best playground ever.
- A fortnight at Union Lido for two adults and two children in a three-bed Vivaldi mobile home with air conditioning, bedlinen and beach towels in mid-May or mid-September booked with Thompson Al Fresco (thomsonalfresco.co.uk/ costs around €800. A fortnight in July costs over €2,000. Canvas Holidays (canvasholidays.ie) and Crystal Holidays (crystalholidays.ie) also offer accommodation at Union Lido. Flights are not included in any of the above prices.