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Never ask a lady her age, goes the age-old maxim, but some people can’t help asking, especially when that older person refuses to conform to the tired old stereotype

IT’S A QUESTION that often crops up. On a sailing course recently, while the rest of the (all-male) crew were discussing the intricacies of the Hawker Siddeley Nimrod, leaving me to peruse a yachting magazine, the tone of conversation shifted and I heard it coming: “Would you mind if we asked you . . .” “No,” I said, before he’d finished, “I never say.” Last time I told someone my age there was a pause before the reply: “But I thought you were the same as everyone else.” What had happened, in that silent second, was a shuffling of preconceived ideas about ageing. I am the same as everyone else – except I’m older.