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I RECENTLY HEARD about a wedding where a keen and enthusiastic (if utterly useless) amateur painter gave one of their own canvases to the bride and groom as a present.

I find that kind of interesting because I saw the picture, and although I don’t know a huge amount about painting, I do know what the surface of a chicken and sweetcorn pizza looks like and I wouldn’t want one hanging on my wall. I wouldn’t even eat it.