Ross O'Carroll-Kelly

Ross O'Carroll-Kelly

Ross O'Carroll-Kelly was the captain of the Castlerock College team that won the Leinster Schools Senior Cup in 1999. It's rare that a day goes by when he doesn't mention it. He is the managing director of his father's confidential document disposal business, Shred Focking Everything. He is a legendary socialite, libertine and seducer, who has been described as "Ireland's most eligible married man" and "the greatest Irish player never to actually make it in the game".

Ross O’Carroll-Kelly

‘We had a peace summit in the Fu King Northside restaurant (Nanjing – Kowloon – Coolock)’

Hearing Father Fehily’s voice in the back of my head – I go, “Ein Reich! Ein Volk! Ein Rock!”’

Put me on the board of governors and I will help make this school great again!

'There’s no denying that something incredible has happened this morning'

I’m in genuine shock, the reason being that I’ve never seen our daughter cry before

‘You want him to die with that knowledge? Castlerock College taking in the unwashed masses’

“Non. Fee. Paying. The more you say it, the more you stop even hearing the words?”

'I told her I thought I was probably gay'

“I ended up having to give it to her straight. That’s right. I told her I thought I was possibly gay.”

Bus tour turf war gets serious

‘Until that moment, I would have said there was no more terrifying feeling in the world than being shaken awake by a woman, going,(...)

'Look at us – being trolled by our daughter across the floor of the BT cafe'

I notice that, like, 10 seconds ago, Honor tweeted, “My mother is a sad and hopeless sap”

Ross O’Carroll-Kelly

‘I feel my fists immediately tighten, like the way they do whenever I see photographs of Caroline Wozniacki with Rory McIllroy. I (...)

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