By golly, does the butler do it these days! Left your Speedos at home? Fear not, because if you’re staying at the W Retreat Spa, in the Maldives, there’s a Bikini Butler on hand to measure you for the perfect swimsuit.
Caught on the horns of a bath dilemma? Hot tap or cold? Salts or bubbles? Petals or ducks? Well, if you’re staying at selected Ritz-Carlton properties there’s a Bath Butler sitting in a hot press somewhere whose raison d’être is to sort you out for the perfect soak.
Having tablet trouble? Then call the same chain’s Technology Butler, there to tell your Wans from your Lans.
Maybe you’re having trouble achieving an even tan, struggling with that hard to reach right shoulder blade? If so, keep an eye out for the Tanning Butler, patrolling the sands at the Ritz-Carlton Hotel South Beach in Miami. Armed with a holster full of SPFs, his full-time job is to protect you from sunburn, although he’ll polish your sunglasses and spray your face with Evian too.
For serious crises, such as arriving at your hotel only to discover you’ve left your Harold Robbins on the plane, there’s always the Book Butler, as offered by the Commons hotel, in Minneapolis.
Or how about the more modern horror of discovering you’ve arrived somewhere swanky but can’t tell enough people about it quickly enough? At the Madison Hotel in Washington DC they offer the services of a Social Media Butler to follow you round, taking your picture and updating your profile to ensure no experience goes unrecorded – perish the thought.