Grit doctor: How can I get my overweight husband to exercise?

No woman ever got her husband to exercise by nagging him while swilling a glass of chardonnay

Q I'm writing on behalf of my husband. He actually read your book and I had hoped that he would start some exercise. Despite finishing it (and laughing as he read it), he has yet to take the first step. I can't really talk because I don't do any exercise either, but I am naturally slim and feel pretty good. He is overweight (at least a couple of stone I'm guessing) and carries most of it around his middle. He loves drinking lager and wine, and enjoys his pie and chips. His only involvement in sports is watching it on the telly. How can I get him to exercise?

Worried wife

A Excess weight carried predominantly around the middle of our bodies should set alarm bells ringing. It puts your husband at a greater risk of heart disease, diabetes, hypertension and stroke. It is diet that will play a huge role in curtailing these risks (and reducing his middle).

Replacing those pints of lager with pints of H2O would be a great place to start and reducing wine and any other alcohol intake until it’s well within the recommended guidelines. The motivation to change these habits will have to come from him, but if you are currently drinking with him, that puts you in a pretty strong position to help lead the way.

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And lead the way you must, because no partner in the world ever got her husband to change by telling him to get off the sofa while swilling a glass of chardonnay.

While a better diet is key, a healthy lifestyle should include regular exercise. And the great thing is that regular exercise also complements and helps foster a healthier attitude to food. So exercise itself will help you to cut the crap out of your diets. He has already read the bible (Run Fat B!tch Run), so now it's your turn.

Regular exercise is every bit as important for you as it is for your husband. Far from being a reason not to bother exercising at all, being slim is a great reason to get started, because it will be much easier for you to get around a circuit without all that extra poundage dragging you down.

The reasons I exercise have nothing to do with my weight and everything to do with my overall fitness and good health (stronger heart, calmer mind, increased bone density, better muscle power, deeper sleep, increased energy and appetite for life). After 40, all these reasons become ever more prescient, helping to ward off or at least help offset so many of the side effects of middle age. So, get cracking on creating a circuit yourself.

Consider it a huge bonus that the transition from walk to run will be all the smoother for you. Perhaps you can be inspired by the idea of beating him to 5km?

Three things that might de-motivate 

Repeatedly reminding him how out of condition, unhealthy and unattractive he is and that you cannot believe how much weight he has put on. Panicking him into thinking he is about to have a heart attack by forwarding him links to health scare horror stories.

Looking for the “perfect” sport or an activity that he really enjoys before getting started. This sport searching may result in another year wasted.

Five things that might motivate:

Identifying and implementing a healthier food plan for your whole family. Regular meals, normal portions, no seconds.

Get fit yourself. There is no more powerful a motivator than a good example. Walk the walk. Then run the walk.

Talk a lot about how great you are feeling (from regular running), how energetic, excited, happy and healthy; focusing on all the positive benefits but without the whiff of a nag or any smugness.

If all else fails . . . break the remote control, give the TV to charity and glue his feet into his trainers while he is asleep. Then set an alarm call screaming in his ear to get up at 6am.

The Grit Doctor says . . . Run Fat B****** Run!

Ruth Field is author of Run Fat B!tch Run, Get Your Sh!t Together and Cut the Crap.