The year in (short) Letters to the Editor

January

Beethoven’s shopping note

Sir, – Tallis this, I’m a Schumann most of your readers Allegri that this Messiaen has gone Farrar enough. I refer, of Carse, to those letter-writers and their Palestrina dream-up puns that, by now, are, in Pärt, obviously Borodin from other letters, Scriabin the barrel and just pure Scheidt. I can’t Handel any Moore; in fact Arne I Orff to Haydn the Tavener for some decent Bartok and to Glinka Glass of Meyerbeer. Gluck. – Yours, etc, NIGEL MOONEY, Ballydonnell, Avoca, Co Wicklow. (January 28)

Sir, – I hope these musically X-rated puns are censored more carefully in the future. My daughter is A Minor. – Yours, etc, EOIN KEEHAN, Ballisk Court, Donabate, Co Dublin. (January 28)

February

History of Ireland in 100 excuses

Sir, – 281. Frank McNally started it (Irishman’s Diary, February 9th). – Yours, etc, MATTIE LENNON, Lacken, Blessington, Co Wicklow. (February 18)

A sign of the times

Sir, – I have now witnessed the ultimate “climb down” in our cash-strapped economy. An 08 registered Bentley being driven as a taxi! – Yours, etc, Sir HENRY GRATTAN BELLEW, Ard Lorcain, Stillorgan, Co Dublin. (February 22)

March

Fit to print (and print)

Sir, – Given Deputy Aengus Ó Snodaigh’s obvious enthusiasm for widespread information dissemination, may we now characterise Sinn Féin’s electoral strategy as a ballot box in one hand and an ink cartridge in the other? – Yours, etc, TOM O’CONNOR, Riverchapel, Gorey, Co Wexford. (March 1)

Sir, – Is it time to take the ink cartridge out of Irish politics? – Yours, etc, JOE LANGAN, Port-na-Blagh, Co Donegal. (March 2)

O tempora! O mores!

Sir, – Pacta sunt servanda: Delenda est Irlanda. – Yours, etc, JOHN A MURPHY, Douglas Road, Cork. (March 15)

April

History of Ireland in 100 insults

A chara, – 343. The last time I saw a mouth like that, there was a hook in it. – Is mise, BRIAN O’REILLY, Newtown, Naas, Co Kildare. (April 11)

Fiscal crisis, what fiscal crisis?

Sir, – How can any of us understand the gravity of the Irish fiscal crisis while our politicians and top civil servants continue to take home extortionate wages? Obviously, if we can afford to still pay the top 17,000 public servants (who earn over €100,000 a year) a total amount of over €2.4 billion, the same amount that covers the bottom 150,000 who earn less that 20,000, there is no financial crisis. – Yours, etc, PAULINE BLEACH, Wolli Creek, New South Wales, Australia. (April 20)

May

Cardinal Brady’s role questioned

Sir, – The mental reservation is beginning to fill up. Another inmate will be arriving shortly. – Yours, etc, LIAM McMULLIN, Donamon, Co Roscommon. (May 5)

An angry exchange of letters

Sir, – EU plus IMF equals “I FUME”. – Yours, etc, JOHN BRENNAN, Church Street, East Wall, Dublin 3. (May 26)