Shuffle: Eurovision nadirs, country humour, Chromatics and Tandem Felix

Electro Velvet - Still In Love With You

Critics are calling the UK’s choice of a Mick Jagger impersonator as one half of its Eurovision 2015 entry proof, if it were needed, that the Brits just don’t take the competition seriously any more. But I think Ireland beat them to the punch. Remember the year we sent a tuneless, squawking turkey as our representative? What was it called again? Oh yes, Linda Martin.

Trevor Moore - Gays Got Married

A string of pro-marriage-equality tracks have popped up in this column lately. So, in the interest of balance, I promised also to feature any anti-gay-marriage anthems I stumbled upon. Step forward, country singer Trevor Moore, who here sets out an apocalyptic vision of the near future. (“I’ve seen the devil,” he warns. “And the devil looks like Mario Lopez in jean shorts washing a car.”) The entire anti-equality agenda may be laughable, but at least Trevor Moore is in on the joke.

Chromatics - I Can Never Be Myself When You're Around
Italians Do It Better 

The first of this week's tracks to have a title that is also something Lena Dunham probably says to her mother a lot is I Can Never Be Myself When You're Around, by Chromatics. It's on the band's fifth studio album, Dear Tommy, due for release sometime this month.

Tandem Felix - Nothing I Do Will Ever Be Good Enough
Trout Records

Tandem Felix are a Dublin band who met during up a secondary-school French class. In other words, while the rest of their classmates were knuckling down, these four began indulging in deluded fantasies about pop stardom. This excellent new track got a glowing write-up in the NME last week. And I suppose, what, we're supposed to be impressed by that? Hozier was at the Grammys! Hozier knows Taylor Swift! (And no, Tandem Felix, nothing you do will ever be good enough . . .)