Hip and crispy: cereal gets a killer makeover

Everything tastes better when it’s vaguely nostalgic; this is what we’ve learned from the two Irish lads who’ve founded the UK’s first cereal-only café. Set to open in London’s Brick Lane next month, Cereal Killer Café is the brainchild of Belfast twins Alan and Gary Keery, whose excitement is borderline activism: “Cereal has been kept in the confines of people’s homes for too long”.

So to protest this unfair status quo, the twins have committed to making Cereal Killer café a diverse mecca of sugar and milk. And not unlike every other café in Shoreditch, they’ve sourced “some of the best old and new furniture London has to offer, with the whole look based on a bowl of lucky charms”.

They share their inspiration with London fashion week 2014, which featured a “limited edition cereal collaboration” between Kelloggs and designer Anya Hindmarch. Boxes were rebranded with swankier versions of their cartoon animal mascots, and Kelloggs-print clutch bags and purses were inexplicably brought in to existence. Incidentally, one of these bags costs several hundred pounds more than the entire sum raised by the Cereal Killer Café fundraiser on indiegogo.

The lesson here is that cereal is popular, but cereal taken out of context is far more popular. But the last word must go to Jerry Seinfeld: “I like the idea of eating and drinking at the same time without looking.” To date, the most powerfully sane statement ever made about cereal.