When to go for a pee during classic movies

An app that tells you when to nip out during the three-hour ‘The Godfather’? What a relief!

Start the app when you sit down to watch a film, and it will buzz at the boring bit

Start the app when you sit down to watch a film, and it will buzz at the boring bit

 

Even the corniest summer blockbusters now regularly clock in at two-and-a-half hours. So perhaps it should be no surprise that RunPee, an iPhone app advising film viewers when to step out for a wee, is a runaway success. Start the app when you sit down to watch a film, and it will buzz in your pocket when a boring bit long enough for a loo break is coming up.

The app was launched in 2008 by American developer Dan Florio and has attracted positive testimonials from stars including Rashida Jones and Stephen Fry. Hugh Jackman says it was recommended to him by Anne Hathaway.

Updated regularly, RunPee already recommends two wee-appropriate moments each in new releases The Emoji Movie and The Dark Tower (judging by the reviews, you could probably sit them both out in the bathroom in their entirety). Yet even classic movies allow for a quick sprint to the loo and back.

If you leave at “Take the cannoli”, the most you will miss is Clemenza’s meatball recipe
If you leave at “Take the cannoli”, the most you will miss is Clemenza’s meatball recipe

The Godfather

Just after he has helped to whack his former protege Paulie in the car, capo Peter Clemenza cooks for the Corleone family’s made men. If you nip out after the line “Take the cannoli”, the most you will miss is Clemenza’s meatball recipe. To many Godfather fans, this scene is a classic that settles for ever the question of whether to add sugar to tomato sauce. But it was a creation of director (and legendary gourmand) Francis Ford Coppola, and does nothing to advance the plot.

You could skip Plainview trying to communicate with his newly deaf son
You could skip Plainview trying to communicate with his newly deaf son

There Will Be Blood

After the long, awe-inspiring blowout sequence in Paul Thomas Anderson’s masterpiece comes some pee-permitting downtime: fresh oil derricks in operation; Plainview (Daniel Day-Lewis) trying to communicate with his newly deaf son and then asking his sidekick, Hamilton, to find a sign-language teacher. You’ll be back in time to watch Day-Lewis beat the crap out of Paul Dano and drag him through the mud by his hair.

Exit at minute 59, just after Ilsa and Laszlo have failed to get visas from Ferrari
Exit at minute 59, just after Ilsa and Laszlo have failed to get visas from Ferrari

Casablanca

Casablanca is a mere 102 minutes, compared with Blood’s 158. But if you still can’t make it through without a pit-stop, then go at minute 59, just after Ilsa and Laszlo have failed to get a pair of exit visas from fez-sporting kingpin Ferrari. You’ll miss a bit of inconsequential business at Rick’s bar, albeit with some word-class repartee between Bogey and a twinkly Claude Rains. Be sure to get back before Laszlo comes looking for Rick’s hidden letters of transit.

When Andy gives Red a harmonica, run for it
When Andy gives Red a harmonica, run for it

The Shawshank Redemption

Andy has just done a spell in solitary. Red has failed to win freedom at his latest parole board hearing. It’s time for a montage. Leave the room when Andy gives Red a harmonica. You will miss Red returning the favour with a Marilyn Monroe poster, followed by a section about Andy securing funding for a prison library and some light banter between the inmates about a copy of The Count of Monte Cristo (another prison break classic) by “Alexandra Dumbass”.

Just after the heroes escape the Death Star is a good time to empty your bladder
Just after the heroes escape the Death Star is a good time to empty your bladder

Star Wars: A New Hope

Our heroes have just escaped the Death Star, and it’s time to escape your seat and empty your bladder before the final battle. You’ll only miss General Dodonna briefing the rebel forces. He explains how to blow up the Death Star, but surely you know all that already: there’s a two-metre-wide thermal exhaust port, leading to a shaft that goes directly to the reactor system. A direct hit on the port will start a chain reaction and destroy the station, yada yada yada.

Guardian Service