Doogie Howser TD
As others have noted, the coming election has thrown up an unprecedented number of independent candidates. It looks as if I might actually get to vote for the Trotskyite Cat Party or Lord Bannahead. I’ve done so before and have …
As others have noted, the coming election has thrown up an unprecedented number of independent candidates. It looks as if I might actually get to vote for the Trotskyite Cat Party or Lord Bannahead. I’ve done so before and have never regretted it. The lone wolf causing the most chatter in my part of the world is, however, young Master Dylan Haskins. This is not the place to comment on his policies. The lad appears to have knocked together a comprehensive website and — looking more like Michael Cera than Neil Patrick Harris — has shot some impressively severe straight-to-camera YouTube videos.
But there’s no way around it. He just looks so iggle-piggle young. Oddly, his apparent sincerity actually adds to the campaign’s peculiarity. Properly young folk do occasionally run for office (Haskins is 23), but they usually have the decency to advocate free Jammie Dodgers for students or changing the national anthem to Karma Police by Radiohead. That sort of thing. The seriousness of Mr Howser’s campaign literature just contributes to the suspicion that the star of How I Met Your Mother is advancing on your gallbladder.
It also doesn’t help that his slogan is — to dally in oxymoronic territory — the blandly provocative “It Starts Here”. Wags have already been scribbling beneath his posters. “Puberty” one reads. My colleague in this place suggests “Big School”.
Anyway, I say again that I make no judgments on Master Haskins’s policies. My only objective has been to exercise bitter prejudices about the young and idealistic. I’m still voting for Commander Frogbiscuit.