Well, I say the greatest film of 2010, but that may, in fact, be downplaying the truly staggering potential of Old Dogs. Barely a day goes by when I fail to receive an email asking whether there is any chance of John Travolta and Robin Williams coming together for a film in which one of them suddenly discovers he has two boisterous children. It would also be nice if, after receiving the news, the dad (Williams, say) faints into a plate of spaghetti. Is there any chance? Is there? Is there?

Obviously, I have to reply that such a delicious prospect would be far too much to hope for. It’s like wishing for the clouds to rain Madeira and the rivers to flow with tawny port.

Then one day I clicked on Apple trailers and the sky filled with fortified wine.

Everything about this film looks fantastic. John Travolta plays a rogue who can’t get enough of the ladies. (What’s so funny?) Robin Williams plays (I say “plays”) a man with the sad, desperate eyes of the terminally misunderstood. What will happen when the twins come to stay? Fun, laughter and a little bit of poignant redemption I’m betting. Still not convinced of Old Dogs’ brilliance? This is a film in which a gorilla smacks John Travolta in the face with a tractor tire, for Pete’s sake.

Gorilla. Tire. Travolta. If it doesn’t end up being better than La Regle du Jeu  I’ll happily sign up with the Scientologists.

Gorilla. Tire. Travolta.