Sure, it’s damn pretty and Johnny Depp is always watchable, but was there really anything new in this? Formulaic deification of the cocky gangsta with the heart o’ gold, who always looks perturbed when the rest of his gang start shooting people (despite having armed them with guns) and makes all the law enforcers look just plain dumb by walking right into their offices and saluting them with a cheeky grin. Those very law enforcers who just happen to look away, or bend to light a cigarette or fall asleep just at the EXACT moment the bad guy chooses to run by. (I get it! It’s stylized! That’s just not enough of an excuse, I’m afraid.) Then (spoiler coming, look away) there’s that poignant moment when his best friend tells him he feels his time is up and guess what? OMG, no WAY! It was like he was TOTALLY prescient! I know lots of people thought this movie was the dog’s, er, testicular area, and it ain’t bad watching, but don’t be fooled into thinking this is the best thing ever. Depp is deadly. Bale is bland. Cotillard is lovely and the love scenes are smokin’. But honestly – it’s a good film that is seductively atmospheric but not the great movie you’re probably expecting. Course, why trust me – this is what Donald Clarke had to say.