Ciara Kenny

The Irish Times forum by and for Irish citizens living overseas,

Goodbye Piccadilly, farewell Leicester Square

Exhausted after five years in London, Jonathan Drennan is moving home

Jonathan Drennan: 'At times I would walk in a trance, pinching myself that this city was my playground, at other times there was a clawing loneliness as I felt isolated and overwhelmed in a city that never stops to check if you are feeling ok.'

Thu, Aug 21, 2014, 12:41


Jonathan Drennan

London is no respecter of time. Five years have flashed by, until I am now left with the final page of my calendar where the red inky crosses are getting closer to my final departure date. I will return to Northern Ireland, perhaps never to return to a place I had always dreamt of living.

Growing up in Belfast, my family made infrequent trips to the city and I was allowed to explore alone from a young age. Then, riding the tube on my own seemed exciting, every stop seemed to signify a beautiful monument or park as I wandered aimlessly. The relentless rush of the city appeared exotic compared to the slower pace of Belfast. It was somewhere I was sure I would live one day.

The fascination continued into my adulthood. I eventually arrived at the age of 23. I navigated job interviews and ruthless estate agents, eventually settling into a haphazard routine. On evening jogs, I would sidestep broken glass and look up and see the splendour of the Southbank lit up at night. The contrast was always there. At times I would walk in a trance, pinching myself that this city was my playground, at other times there was a clawing loneliness as I felt isolated and overwhelmed in a city that never stops to check if you are feeling ok.

The world comes to London. Within a few tube stops, there are thriving Caribbean, French, Indian, Portuguese, Chinese communities. My eyes have been opened to new food and culture without having to leave the central line. The cockney kings and queens of the past have been replaced by a curious global citizen that defines the transient nature of the city.

You may change living here. You can become hardened and supicious when encountering strangers. Or find it hard to travel anywhere without comparing it as an inferior version of London. Try to avoid both of these things if at all possible.

I want to remember some of the happiest years of my life. Friendships from university and school were solidified and I made new ones from all over the world. Flats across the city became open house parties every weekend, an excuse was never needed. There were new people to meet and better still, places to explore. Art galleries, French films you don’t really understand, theatres, football teams to adopt and night buses to navigate. I loved to get lost, wandering in new neighbourhoods, seeing things for the first and last time, ready to explore somewhere different the next weekend armed with stories for the office on Monday.

At times, I wrote in my diary that London had lost its lustre. A clumsy sentence perhaps, but it just meant I was exhausted. Exhausted from long hours at work, navigating and battling suffocating crowds on the street and underground, before eventually getting home to rest. Thankfully, these entries were infrequent. A week of frustration would normally give way to one of endless opportunities that were only possible in the greatest city to be young, London. I am thankful I had the opportunity to be part of it.

Jonathan Drennan (28) works in advertising, and is returning to Belfast to spend time with his family. He also writes about sport for The Irish Times, and contributed to Generation Emigration in 2012 about how the Irish abroad should be embracing the opportunities emigration offers rather than wistfully yearning for the past in Ireland.

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