Don’t waste cash “learning” to be a model – here’s why
The past few years have seen – alongside the shuttering of shops, elevation of interest rates, fall in property prices and general disintegration of our economy – a stark rise in the number of courses, classes and workshops being held …
The past few years have seen – alongside the shuttering of shops, elevation of interest rates, fall in property prices and general disintegration of our economy – a stark rise in the number of courses, classes and workshops being held that promise to give young Irish women the keys to the castle, that is, the knowledge and skills required to be a high-fashion model.
Well, it might be time for some harsh truths, starting with this: there are no skills, and there is no knowledge, that you can attain or learn in a one-, two- or three-day course that will help you be a model. You know how you get to be a model? You are naturally blessed with a high metabolism, a relatively symmetrical face and you are 5 ft 8 in or more. In short, you can not learn to be a model. You can go on all the courses in the world, and you can learn to walk like a model, pose like a model and even diet and exercise like a model, but unless you are blessed with those very specific attributes in the first place, you are not going to be a model. I feel a bit like Simon Cowell on X Factor, but that is the truth; most of us, bless our hearts, will never be models.
The other harsh truth is, of course, that in Ireland, there is no high-fashion modelling industry. Our models pose on top of boxes wearing bikinis to launch a new Facebook app; they wear rugby T-shirts and knickers when promoting charity fashion shows (that actually happened); they walk short distances and lean against railings for Xposé. None of them are on first name terms with Karl Lagerfeld, Anna Wintour or Alber Elbaz (although one of them has been on the cover of Playboy).
Still want to be a model? Take off all of your make-up and your heels. Wear a pair of skinny jeans and a vest, and have a friend take your photograph against a blank wall – full-length, side profile and close-ups of your face. Then get in touch, with your pics, with one of Ireland’s model agencies (we have a few): 1st Option, Assets, Andrea Roche, Compton, Absolute, the Holman Lee Agency and Morgan the Agency, to name but a few. Your best bet is to call them up and arrange to drop in; few agencies will show any real interest until they see you in the flesh. When you arrive, wear minimal make-up and something really plain; they want to see your face and body, not your fabulous dress sense.
They may not be interested, but you can always try another one – or, you know, you can decide that you don’t have much of an interest in walking up and down in dresses as a career and decide to do something else. Either way, don’t waste your cash learning what can’t be taught.