No stars and plenty of gripes as Lark in the Park cancelled

DÁIL SKETCH:FINE GAEL'S abortive Lark in the Merrion Square Park formed the backdrop to yesterday's Dáil proceedings.

The party’s TDs and Senators had been scheduled to gather for a lunchtime photocall in the park across the road from Leinster House. They would, according to a press release issued on Wednesday, hold coloured stars “detailing significant Fine Gael achievements in Government”.

Labour TDs were not best pleased when they heard about it. They wondered what had happened to the Coalition solidarity trumpeted by Taoiseach Enda Kenny and Tánaiste Eamon Gilmore when they presented the Government’s first annual progress report on Wednesday.

Shortly before 9am yesterday, a further Fine Gael press release announced the cancellation of the Lark in the Merrion Square Park.

It was discussed when Fine Gael TDs and Senators, minus the coloured stars, met Kenny for breakfast in the Dáil members’ restaurant to celebrate International Women’s Day.

Sources revealed that some of those present had more egg on their faces than on their plates.

Later, in the Dáil chamber, Fine Gael and Labour backbenchers eyed each other suspiciously.

Mayo TD Dara Calleary led the Fianna Fáil troops, wishing everybody a happy International Women’s Day. “I hope it is a productive day with good outcomes.”

It was all downhill after that.

A gleeful Opposition taunted the Coalition about the cloud that had enveloped the coloured stars.

Fianna Fáil’s Timmy Dooley advised Fine Gael to get a grip.

Party colleague Billy Kelleher recalled the Kenny-Gilmore press conference: “They were like giddy Junior Certificate students with their examination results.”

Sinn Féin’s Peadar Tóibín dismissed it as a “back-slapping fest”.

Gilmore insisted the Government spent every day trying to secure investment and generate jobs. He made no reference to the Lark in the Merrion Square Park.

Calleary expressed mock sympathy for Gilmore. It was unfortunate, he said, that the Tánaiste’s biggest achievement in office had come too late for inclusion in the Government’s love letter to itself on its first year in office. That was forcing Fine Gael to cancel “its stars’ party this afternoon”, he declared.

Calleary’s earlier optimism about good outcomes dissolved as the day’s business progressed.

AIB job losses, mass emigration, gangland crime and the septic tank and household charge controversies were discussed.

It was all unremittingly grim.

Perhaps it was just as well that Fine Gael had cancelled its Lark in the Merrion Square Park.