‘I felt Asian here, not European and sometimes I tended to avoid crowds’

Hinata Hallinan was fascinated by western culture as a child. Growing up in bustling Tokyo, Hallinan would devour books about European history and culture and despite her atheist upbringing, she went on to study religion at university.

Her mother, who had paid for more than 15 years of ballet lessons for her youngest daughter, had hoped Hallinan would pursue a career in dance. She was relieved when her daughter joined a ballet company after graduating from university. However, Hallinan was unsure whether she had chosen the right path.

“I was almost professional because I was in a company but I was not a superstar. It’s tough because you can’t make money and you must train every day except Sunday. I really appreciated my parents because they supported me but I wanted to stop.”

In October 2013, the young dancer decided she was ready for a new challenge and booked a one-way flight to Dublin. “I was tired and wanted to do something else. I thought if I continued dancing my life would become only that, only ballet. I thought it would be good to challenge myself and try something new.”

At school, Hallinan opted to focus on her dancing skills rather than practising her English grammar. However, as the desire to travel grew stronger, she began to recognise the necessity of practising her language skills.

Her mother was less keen about her daughter’s travel plans. “She was freaked out and wanted me to continue ballet which is understandable because it was the only thing I could really do.”

Despite her mother’s apprehension, Hallinan decided to move to Ireland to learn English. She found an English language school online and made arrangements to stay with a host family in Raheny in north Dublin. Her plan was to spend less than a year in Ireland so that she could be back in Tokyo for her birthday in September.

She arrived in Dublin on a cold, wet November evening. The first three months in her new home were a blur of English classes, rainy days, dinners with her host families and attempts to figure out Irish culture.

“The problem was I didn’t know how to speak and communicating properly was so difficult. My host family were very nice and maybe I understood what they were saying but I couldn’t answer.”

Fortunately, Hallinan quickly made friends in her English class, including a number of Japanese students. By spring 2014, she had begun to settle into life in Dublin but couldn’t shake off the feeling that she stuck out wherever she went.

“I really felt Asian and not European. I felt like people were looking at me and sometimes I tended to avoid crowds. I think I was just getting used to being here.”

One evening she was walking along a street when a man shouted a derogatory remark in her direction. “Maybe I was over thinking it but it definitely felt like Asian discrimination. I was very shocked and suddenly wanted to go home.”

Determined to complete her English course, Hallinan stayed in Dublin and in July she met an Irish man called David. The couple began dating and in September, Hallinan decided to change her flight home and stay in Ireland a bit longer.

“I wasn’t that interested in him at the beginning. When we met for the first time he just gave me his business card so it was more formal. Before that I had met Irish guys who were pushy but he wasn’t pushy.”

“I thought maybe I’ll stay one more year and then I’ll go home. Everybody said to me, it’s not a good idea to stay here because you’ve met a man. But I thought, it’s the same situation if I go home now. I’ll still be looking for a job or I’ll just go back into the ballet life.”

In October 2014, Hallinan was offered an administrative job at UCD and the following year, her Irish boyfriend proposed. Her family met David for the first time at the couple’s wedding. “They came for the wedding but they’d never met, so it was a bit awkward. My parents don’t speak English but my husband can speak some Japanese so at least they knew what he was saying.”

In March 2016, Hallinan decided to give dancing another go and began training to join an Irish ballet company. However, with so few opportunities available for dancers in Ireland she eventually gave up. A few months later, she met a woman from Latvia who ran a dance studio in central Dublin and was looking for a ballet teacher. Hallinan, who now lives in Rathgar with her husband, was offered the job and began teaching adults at the school.

“It’s completely different to when I danced by myself but I’m so happy. Now I can use my skills and I don’t feel like what I did before was a waste of time. I feel as if I’m needed and that’s very nice. I’m not a ballet star but I have the skills and the knowledge so I can teach.”

Last year, she travelled home to visit her parents, sister and two nieces. “It all felt like a dream. When I was in Japan it felt like I was dreaming about Ireland and it didn’t feel like real life. Then when I got back her my life in Japan felt like a dream.”

Even though she loves her work, Hallinan often feels homesick. “I miss my family and my friends because I’m not really outgoing so I don’t have a massive amount of friends here. My friends in Japan, we’ve known each other since we were in secondary or even primary school so the friendships there are different.”

She’s also developed a new appreciation for the history and culture of her home country. “Before I left I didn’t really feel traditional Japanese culture or architecture was beautiful, I was too fascinated by western culture. But I’ve recently discovered that Japanese culture is really beautiful and I’ve already decided the next time I go home I will definitely visit some Japanese temples or shrines. I’ve finally realised how beautiful Japan is.”

We would like to hear from people who have moved to Ireland in the past five years. To get involved, email newtotheparish@irishtimes.com. @newtotheparish